brian shoots straight up. lucky for him, (i never bother with the first sounding of alarm, or the second, or the third for that matter.) a blur occurs from this point until parking at the airport with the exception of a wrong turn and the discovery of [what is most-possibly!] the only roundabout in minnesota. small kisses, big hugs, safe flights, safe drives, "i think i'll call-in to work and say that my car wouldn't start and spend the day wallowing" i said, "no, go to work, have a good day at work" he said, i love yous in both audible and inferrible forms. and i race to work: tear wellage in eyes and all. [TAH-DAH! emotion!] no appropriate soundtrack for the drive, so i fondled some dressy bessy and flirted shamelessly with NPR. tried and failed to get coffee at usual pitstop between twin cities metro area and st. peter. the uncooperative gasstation clerk, whose sole purpose this morning was to supply me with black (but weak and bad) coffee, could not find any beans. i had to moralbackslide my way into drinking gasstation "french vanilla cappuccino" which caused non-emotion-based tears to well up in already leaky eyes.

made it to work late.

work was good, but it was hell. courageous menu planning (chicken adobo, savory butternutsquash cakes with blue cheese [for the man of the morning hours] white sauce, onion pie, sake roasted salmon, vegetable harvest back, blue moon fettuccini, spicy orange tofu, and of course the professor and mary ann) overspent me in the first half of shift and thankfully, shyama was there to bail me out and mash my potatoes.

and now i'm home. a fresh inch of snow has attempted to erase the freshprints brian left as conscious reminder of his stay. room is completely dishevelled and shall remain so (i'm revelling in this room d'lovetryst look.) the rest of the day is mine. i shall bath and watch tele and return the bodypillow of illrepute to the newly-vacated spot of the bed...

...though i may venture out to find periwinkle-coloured pillowcases for it.

and yes, i am as melancholic as this entry would lead one to believe... but this is quite an exciting feat! certainly providing unnecessary validation of state-less love.

oh good god, this entry is far too long.