the BRUTAL, UGLY truth of my FABULOUS, BEAUTIFUL life.



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6:52 p.m. + 2005-01-08 = "disassemble my despair. it never took me anywhere. it never once bought me a drink."

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life goals are a thing. a thing of a thing in a thing. in and of itself.
and now is half-past it's-about-bloody-time that i commit innermost desires, drives and dreams to words.
[in no particular order, as always.]

1. record deal. critical acclaim. at least two gigs a month. not terribly bothered with touring, though.

2. a hilarious book written in collaboration with sistersister. critical acclaim. a nice, big check.

3. my own restaurant/bakery. named, "Tr�d och Ljus." neo-skandinavien cuisine. though somehow... greasy-spoonish breakfasts and my scones.

4. my own house/flat/property. or a home of our own. [shared expenses, shared equity.]

5. one to two kids.

6. a dog. a cat. a hedgehog, possibly.

7. a wedding. [this, though, limited to one scenario.] i do not understand how i can or why i love something/one as much as i do. to be honest, it's freaking me out.

8. my friends within the same area code again. again, i do not understand how i can or why i love somethings/ones as much as i do. and again, to be honest, it's freaking me out.

9. to save the world.

10. gamenight!

11. a kitchen with a baker's bench and always someone for which to be cooking.

12. a toyota hybrid.

13. beerbrewing kit and expertise.

14. sara brown's infamous swedish fortune cookies.

15. li'lest sister to get rid of her boy and live the awesome life she was meant to live.

16. the happiness of all those around me and all those around them. and etc. but most of all, more than anything: his.

17. to master swedish and english and be leading authority on all such matters. so much so, that whatever i say must be true, irregardless of fact it might be blatant lie.

18. to be called on it.

19. my own recording studio within home.

20. travel.

21. to not post this.

22. [to post this.]

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comments?? --->[thisaway]--->[[looks to me as though there are...]]---> 0 repercussions thus far

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[prologue] *** [epilogue] ***[plottwist!]

[[erstwhile]] ***** [[forthwith]]

reference desk

me
&
you
or
us
&
them
else...
immortality!



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