pt. 1 "scenes of last night"

i managed to stay the entire 4 hours of working in admissions phoning because amanda was so kind to give me busybody work that did not include using the actual phone. i went out for a fag at 9 o'clock... and WOW.

the sky had darkened, but to the west over the beginning of the plains, the sun set branding a line of pinkishorangishpurple juxtaposed against the darker-side of dusk. the wind breezed, the air was perfect. and as i walked to the pub for $1 rails night whilst listening to kim richey's "glimmer" (god knows why... it's not the best album... "subpar" is actually the word i'm looking for), i felt that summer was ending. thank god.

i walked the large blocks and thought about midwesterners and space... much like greenlanders and space, only if you put a midwesterner in a cell, they won't be panicked by the sight of borders.

drank my $1 whiskeysours and came out of my shell. voice grew louder, stories accompanied by extra hand gestures as the blood-alcohol levels increased.

acquaintence sarah started talking about her grandfathers desire for her to meet a swedish-lutheran boy as the reason she came to gustavus. she then said, "i just can't handle this stoic, scandinavian-midwestern crap." it struck me as odd, i had never thought of minnesotan as stoic... not like the swedes or norwegians or danes at least. i felt a rush of pride for my heritage.

during the walk home i started calculating the slight things i generally overlook--take for granted--about minnesota, st. peter, minnesota. i went to bed feeling okay for the first time in ages... it's like i've already decided that i won't be here in less than a year's time and these are the things i'm pre-emptively missing.

i dreamt of pointing out these things to that other needle in the haystack, as we are visiting my home. perhaps he was feigning interest, but the feign was well appreciated because he saw how excited i was to explain crop-rotation and the increasing humidity in the air caused by farmers using genetically-altered seeds that sprout plants that put much more moisture in the air than their natural counterparts, and it made him smile as he kissed the top of my head.